The first time I heard this phrase – deferred maintenance – it was in reference to a dilapidated house for sale which,  despite its jankiness,  was still well out of my price range.

The seasoned real estate agent said, “Once we are under contract we’ll get the inspector out to see what the real damage is and get an idea how much it will cost to get this house livable again.”

I was NOT impressed.

Who decides to just let their house go like that?

Why didn’t they just call a roofer and get it taken care of?

Couldn’t they see the weeds sprouting out of the gutters and the cracks in the pavement?

What were these people doing instead of taking care of their house?


Fast forward almost 20 years – and a home purchase + a kid of my own – and now I get it.

The people deferring maintenance on their house were busy: having babies, raising kids, getting laid off, starting new careers, burying their parents – the complicated stuff of life that gets in the way of taking care of what’s right in front of our eyes.

Every once in a while there is a time when things are clear and we’re able to look around to assess the damage caused by neglect and to start to build plans to get that house, that life, back into shape once again.

Hopefully this happens before you have to sell the house because you’ve lost the spouse to death or divorce, but rather in a lull in between major life events.

Look up when times are boring, uneventful, and take stock of what’s happened since the last major life event and see what you can do before the next.

Our lives (and selves), like our houses, also need to be tended to between happenings.

When was the last time you took stock of your self-care?

Have you been deferring maintenance on YOU?


A class for those of us who are always putting self-care off.

In this 6 week class we will focus on self-care 101. Each week we will focus on a different area of self-care, make a plan and hold each other accountable.

This class is perfect for:

  • Parents who have put self-care on the back burner because of kids.
  • Women who work for themselves (and never seem to stop)
  • People who put everyone else’s needs in front of their own.This class will be on-line so you can be anywhere in the world.

The sessions will be recorded and sent after each class.

Click here to enroll.