My Night Time Self-Care Routine

My Night Time Self-Care Routine

 

My morning routine is non-negotiable. This helps me start my day feeling the way I want to feel: calm, nourished and nurtured.

 

The morning through afternoon is solid. I feel like things are under control and I’m productive. In short, I feel like this non-negotiable self-care helps set the tone for my day and helps me be who I want to be and feel the way I want to feel.

 

Hooray for 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care!

 

 

After dinner feels way different though. It feels off, not quite solid, because it is willy nilly.  I do different things and not surprisingly, I get different results. So for now we’ll call this evening “routine” a work in progress.

 

My night time sleep routine is solid. It has to be or I am a mess the next day because I don’t sleep. I am the ultimate princess and the pea come to life!

 

I have to say sleep prep doesn’t start at bedtime. It really starts at lunchtime. You can watch me talk about how to get more sleep here.

 

My night time “routine” includes:

 

  • Not drinking caffeine after lunch.
  • Not drinking alcohol at all because it disturbs my sleep even if I just have a little bit. God knows, I’ve tried.
  • Soaking in the bath really early and being in my pajamas before 7pm.
  • No screen time after 9pm.
  • Reading real books – preferably fiction for an hour before sleep.
  • Blackout curtains, fan for white noise, air purifier, and the best eye mask.
  • The sunset feature on my alarm clock deserves its own love letter. This ish changed my relationship to morning AND going to sleep.
  • Keep the house cool.
  • So so many sleep things!

 

The part of my evening that needs some attention is the 7-8:30/9pm part. Honestly this time of night you can find me sitting on the couch snacking on carbs scrolling through my phone.

 

Not ideal.

 

So I’m going to do some brainstorming on what my ideal post dinner/pre bedtime routine looks and feels like.

 

Here are some questions to ponder:

  • How does what I am currently doing make me feel?
  • How does what I am currently doing contribute to my overall wellbeing?
  • What would I rather be doing instead?
  • What activities could I fill that time with that would get me closer to how I want to feel in my life?
  • Who do I want to spend that time with?
  • What do I really need (instead of carbs and scrolling)?
  • What if I never changed anything about this hour of my evening? How would life look and feel in 5 years?
  • What habits and routines do you want to develop to make this time of day feel more nourishing and nurturing?

 

Feel free to use these questions as a starting point when you are developing your own evening (or morning) routines.

 

What does your evening self-care routine look like?

 

 

If you’d like some help developing your morning and evening routines so you can feel the way you want to feel in your life, I can help!

 

Your Invitation to Work With Me

 

 

Self-Care SOS is a three month program where we work one-on-one to get your habits and routines on track. If you are someone who needs accountability and guidance to make your self-care a priority, I am here to help.

 

Please schedule your Are We a Good Fit Session today!

 

 

 

 

Sunday Link Love #8

Sunday Link Love #8

We have some house things going on and this week was split between loving up my clients and my house. Our sweet Craftsman bungalow home was built in 1905 and is in need of some TLC.

 

Did you know your physical environment/home plays an important role in how you feel in your life? It’s one of the pillars of our personal foundation. So please tend to your nest if you’ve got some unresolved issues at home!

 

How are you today?

 

Each week in 2018 I’ll be sending you articles that have sparked my interest because they are all about Self-Care and Life Satisfaction.

 

 

100% Guilt-Free Self-Care videos! You can catch them here. Side note – my hair is in quite the evolution.

 

Better Sleep Can Make You Feel Like a Million Bucks. – Seriously. I have some sleep tips in the videos.

 

20 Stylish Sneakers You’ll Wear All Spring – I recently got these and my feet have never been happier.

 

Why You Should Surround Yourself With More Books Than You’ll Ever Have Time to Read – Hooray! I’m off to the library (again).

 

BMI is BS – In case you haven’t already heard.

 

What to do in Northern California in February – Jenna and I went on a family hike this month and that reminded me how much I love her travel tips.

 

 

 Why Hire a Life Coach? – Are you ready? Let’s talk!

 

 

I’m currently reading The Confidence Code by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman and I’ve got confidence on my mind especially for women.

 

I’d love to know what you are reading,  watching and listening to these days. Tell me all about it!

 

I look forward to seeing you soon!

xo,
Tami

PS: If you want to be the first to know about upcoming retreats, workshops and opportunities to work together – get on the list.

What’s Your Love Language?

What’s Your Love Language?

Happy Valentine’s Day! We are halfway through Love Month and today I want to talk about love languages and how they relate to self-knowledge.

 

 

Have you read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman? Do you know your primary and secondary love languages? Take the quiz to find out.

 

 

Disclaimer: I don’t highly recommend this book. I bought it, read it and at the end was wanting to tear out the last 20% of the book. The author is super religious and that rubs me the wrong way. That being said, I LOVE the concepts in the book. So if you’d like to get what you need without having to read the book – check out this episode of the Buy The Book podcast.  Kristin and Jolenta break it down with a lot of humor and hit all the necessary points perfectly.

 

What is The Five Love Languages and why does it matter?

I will start with why it matters. As I said here, the best way to build habits and routines that work is through self-knowledge. What works for me might not work for you. What we need and how we respond to the world is different based on who we are as people. So the love languages gives us another piece of the self-knowledge puzzle.

 

 

Specifically why the love languages matters is because your love language is how you feel love and in turn most likely how you show love to others. This matters because what makes you tick is different from what makes me or your partner or sister or BFF tick.

 

The five love languages are:

 

Words of Affirmations (or as I like to call it, GOLD STARS). This is my primary love language. I am driven by genuine, specific compliments. Encouraging words what gets me going in the morning.  It makes my heart sing to hear how great you think I am doing and I love being acknowledged. This is my husband’s secondary love language, so he also digs compliments and gold stars. Compliments make WOA folks feel loved.

 

Acts of Service (or as I like to call it, Getting Shit Done). This is my husband’s primary love language. That dude is always doing stuff around the house, at work, for others. He shows how much he loves you by doing all the yard work, washing the car and putting all the groceries away.  I get it! This is my secondary language. I am a fan of helping people do unpleasant tasks like cleaning out their closets and reading endless rounds of copy for their website. For a full love experience, just wrap it up with a compliment and genuine appreciation at the end. For the Acts of Service folks to feel love, you have to do stuff for them!

 

Quality Time (or as I like to call it, Asses in the Seats). If this is your love language you value time with your people. You always want to be doing stuff with them. You could be running errands at Target or IKEA or seeing your favorite band.  You want to spend time at a cabin and sit by them while you read a book. You just want your peeps to be nearby. For QT people,  you have to show up and stick around for them to feel loved.

 

Physical Touch (or as I like to call it Snuggling and Cuddling) – This is one is super straightforward. You like to hold hands when you walk together places, you like to hug, you want to put your feet in your partner’s lap or have them rub your head. Big bear hugs, massages and touch make PT people feel loved.

 

Receiving Gifts – (or as I like to call it, The Generous Ones) – These folks are the best gift givers in the world. They always send the most thoughtful gifts. If you are on the receiving end of a Gifts person, know that in order for them to feel loved, they need to get gifts too! The gifts don’t have to be expensive, just well thought out.

 

Knowing your love language and ultimately all about YOU will help you build a more personalized self-care plan. Knowing the love languages of your friends, partner and kids will help you express love toward them the way they best feel it. When you share your love language with the people in your life, hopefully they will show you love the way you feel it best.

 

Want to learn more about personalized self-care and how to put it to work in your life?

 

Your Invitation to Work With Me

 

 

Self-Care SOS is a three month program where we work one-on-one to get your habits and routines on track. If you are someone who needs accountability and guidance to make your self-care a priority, I am here to help.

 

Please schedule your Are We a Good Fit Session today!

 

 

 

Sunday Link Love #7

Sunday Link Love #7

The low grade fever, one congested nostril, utter exhaustion thing got me this week. I definitely was put to the test to see if I could/would walk my talk and I’m happy to report I did!

 

I stayed home. I rescheduled all my in person appointments so I wouldn’t share my germs with others. I applied cold care protocol. I read a 400+ page novel and am happy to that my symptoms never got worse!

 

How are you feeling these days?

 

Each week in 2018 I’ll be sending you articles that have sparked my interest because they are all about Self-Care and Life Satisfaction.

 

 

 

Musings Of A Bereaved Daughter – such a beautiful essay about grief, longing and connection. One of my grief self-care practices is to dedicate a few days a year to my mama. I don’t work, I allow my feelings to be what they are (always evolving) and I even bake a cake or pie to celebrate her birthday.

 

An Interview About Resilience – Listening to this interview I was struck with the thought – “OMG, I think I teach resilience!”. A serious case for self-care.

 

Chocolate Lollipops – continuing bonds after losing her mama over Thanksgiving.

 

What Your Myers Briggs Personality Type Says About Your Sleeping Habits – INFJ is spot on for me. ENFJ is spot on for my husband. What about you?

 

Understanding Grief – One of my biggest motivators for teaching and coaching around self-care is bad/tragic stuff happens every single day. An old friend lost her husband this week, someone else’s college kid never woke up, and self-care helps us be resilient when we need to be – when tragedy strikes.

 

 Why Hire a Life Coach? – Are you ready? Let’s talk!

 

 

Sheryl Sandberg’s book OPTION B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience and Finding Joy is an absolute must read.

 

I’d love to know what you are reading,  watching and listening to these days. Tell me all about it!

 

I look forward to seeing you soon!

xo,
Tami

PS: If you want to be the first to know about upcoming retreats, workshops and opportunities to work together – get on the list.

My Non-Negotiable Morning Self-Care Routine

My Non-Negotiable Morning Self-Care Routine

Happy Love Month. This is a perfect time to think about how to be more loving to ourselves. And nothing says self-love like self-care!

 

I believe how you start your day sets the tone for the rest of your day. I believe that how you live your days, you live your life.

 

That said, what do I do to start my day?

 

My Morning Routine:

 

Reflection – (two minutes) – I keep a spreadsheet of questions in my phone. So many people have laughed when they hear this! I use a spreadsheet so I never have the excuse of not being able to find my journal or a pen, or of having bad penmanship.  I ask myself the same questions every day and have for years. I have a running record of my answers over the years.

 

Attention – (two minutes) – I glance at my calendar and see where I might run into obstacles. I make a plan B and jot my idea in my spreadsheet. This helps me anticipate where I might get tripped up in the day and having a plan allows me to make better decisions.

 

Intention – (two minutes) – I decide how I want to feel for the day and write it down. I check in with my word of the year. Do these align? What adjustments will I make to feel the way I want to feel in my life?

 

Gratitude – (three-five minutes) – I write down at least five things I am grateful for and why. Here’s a piece I wrote called How To: Make Yourself Happier The Easy Way. 

 

Meditation – (10-20 minutes) – Headspace – I have been an almost daily user since 2013. Go here for tips to start or maintain a meditation practice or the science behind why everyone should be meditating daily.

 

Breakfast and tea– (5-15 minutes) – I love breakfast: eggs, burritos, oatmeal, soup, leftovers from dinner, avocado toast, green smoothies, I love it all!

 

Movement – (20-60 minutes) – I have to move my body or I get sad and irritable. I wish it wasn’t so, but there is no denying the benefits of movement. I sprinkle movement throughout my day. For yoga movement I am a Curvy Yoga subscriber, for my fitness needs I am a Trainer in Your Back Pocket subscriber and for cardio I love to bounce on my rebounder or walk and talk with a friend or client. I walk errands, stretch while watching TV and make it a point to move 7 days a week. Movement for me isn’t about looking a certain way, it is about feeling good in my body regardless of size or shape. It is a long term investment in my longevity. I’m banking on this exercise keeping me mobile well into my 70s and 80s (and maybe beyond)!

 

Everything except movement gets done first thing in the morning. My self-care morning routine is absolutely non-negotiable.

 

You’ve got to wake up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction. —George Lorimer

 

Ready to make some changes in your morning routine?

 

 

Your Invitation to Work With Me

 

 

Self-Care SOS is a three month program where we work one-on-one to get your habits and routines on track. If you are someone who needs accountability and guidance to make your self-care a priority, I am here to help.

 

Please schedule your Are We a Good Fit Session today!